Lately life has been full with birthdays, planning for my wedding, moving and other events filled with great memories. I have complaint other then finances stretching me out. Yes stretching because things are so tight that I feel like I being stretched on a wrack. Despite that I am not truly bothered still I have been dealing with is a slew of disturbing dreams and a feeling a bit discombobulated in my thought process.There is in lies my contention in my prayer life. I find time to talk to God through out the day. My prayers don't consist of just sitting and offering up a slew or list of things it more like a rambling conversation. At times it is in my head and other times its in the car and still other times its in the shower. It's filled sometimes with poems, other times song and recently with frustrated yelling and requests for helps.
His responses can be through songs, radio djs, still small voice, and even what I am reading just to name a few. Its not perfect by far sometimes I miss what he is saying other times I hear and just don't get it. But that is the way of relationships just ask my fiancee. My prayer life sometimes mimics our relationship.
Still that being the case our everyday life is a challenge and we walk through it laying our lives down, submitting our selves and having an open line of communication with God. This by no means is easy. Paul said work it out with fear and trembling, James says take all the life's crap with joy and I am saying sometimes me and God have it out like Jacob in the river bed having a wrestling match in the dirt and water till he blesses me or subdues me. Yeah faith is a messy process...
Till then ponder, dream, grow and imagine.
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